War of the Wombs


What follows is an aborted post that I gave up on. Interesting word that, aborted.
 
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There's something wrong with the world today when u wake up to learn that Katie Holmes is preggers with Tom Cruise's Alien Baby. It takes everything I got to not throw up.  I feel we have been served some kind of social injustice. I mean like was it not destined that Katie is supposed to be with Dawson? Forever (Or was that Pasey?).
 
How does Nic feel about all this? How does Mimi? How do you? How does Mrs Cruz?

 

In some crazy way I feel Oprah owes us all big time for unleashing this madness.

20 comments:

SPFW said...

it's all a big revenge plot - it's not Nicole's fault she's too skinny to ovulate!!!! she eats like 2 salads a day man!!! that's heaps.
The whole relationship is fukt. she's an oaf, he's a runt - she has a fake smile, he has a real one cos he's tappin' that. Drives me insane, it's totally not sweet and romantic like everyone plays out.

Dawson had a big forehead.

Anonymous said...

I hate to be a gossip and all....but apparently Nic was pregnant with Tommy-boy's baby when he dumped her...and then she miscarried "due to the stress". Maybe Tom only recently hit puberty and thus gained the ability to fertilise?

PS who is this SPFW person?? I'll tell if you will...although James must know the real identities of both of us, scary....

JJ said...

lets just say you both are as good looking as each other.

SPFW said...

oooh anonymous. I will somewhat reveal my identity: SPFW is a far removed form of my name. You see it stands for "South Pacific Floral Wonder." Now this is not a reference to my culture (far from it, i'm as anglo as they come). It is merely a description of one of my favorite flowers, the Frangipani, coined by the whore himself. Frangipani is a nick name given to me by a dear friend as the first four letters spell Fran, which is again a derivitive of my real name. Now the history of being called Frangipani is quite dear to me. It in fact started as Frannipan. This was because my dear friend StrawBarry knew there was a flower that started with Fran, but didn't quite know how to say it, hence Frannipan, which became Frannipans. I miss StrawBarry and i think i'll give him a phone call today.

geekonimist said...

Thanks SPFW, I've learnt something today! I'm also intrigued as to the identity of the 'anonymous' person - come out from behind your anonymity and expose yourself!

BTW I'm also sickened by the Katie-Tom thing, although it does give those of us heading into the twilight of our lives (in my case the second half of the 30s) hope that we too can score a much younger girl!

SPFW said...

um, well yes - In Hollywood. You either have to be a baller or a shot caller. I feel so vulnerable now that i have exposed myself. So what exactly did you learn geekonomist? Was it that i like Frangipani? or was it that i am in fact not from the South Pacific? Or was it that i have a friend called strawBarry?

Anonymous said...

Well now that SPFW has outed herself...I must uphold my promise and do the same!!

The name "anonymous" was given to me by...oh no wait, that doesn't really work does it!

You eagle eyes may have noticed that I occasionally sign off with an "H". Similarly to SPFW, this refers to the plant (sadly, not really a flower. Do berries count as flowers?) on which my name is based. Yes, the "old-English goodwill at Christmas", Holly! I thought the Thames thing would have given it away actually...who the hell else does anyone know who is from Thames!! (And who is also hot...) H ;o)

Anonymous said...

PS Geekonomist....your turn next....

I'm better looking than u all said...

H - he's a smelly old boy don't worry your pretty self about him.

it's all about the frangipani right now said...

mean. geekonomist may have 9 illigitimate children (that he knows about) but i don't think he smells.

geekonomist said...

Looks like I missed the fun earlier this morning by having to be a geekonomist. JJ, I may be approaching my middle years but I haven't got that old man smell - yet!

H - the Whore informs me that you are hot. Nice...

SPFW said...

hmm Hot Holly should go on the wall of hotness. i do find it hard to believe that hot people come out of Thames though. perhaps a purrrty mouth... but not hotness

Jimmy Jangles said...

H is really fcuking hot. As is her sister B. When I was in 'nam the thought of those two waiting for me backhome was what got me thru.

*** of course, Jay Bee is hotter. period. If any one is going on the wall of hotness its her.

Infaireness to geekyboy he doesn't smell. infact geek is unfair word that should not be used to describe him. I'll use Cool Cricket Fan henceforth.

geekoinmist aka cool cricket fan said...

You're a fine chap JJ - I'll of course be enjoying the cricket this weekend. I thought Vettori's bowling the other night against the Aussies was nearly as perfect as last Friday's gastronomic delights.

His Whoreness said...

did someone mention the whore?

SPFW said...

yeah like 12 comments ago!!! this must be some kind of a record. I too have been watching cricket. After a flying start from the world XI i picked a middle order crumble. we turned off when my prophecy was coming true. Do you think i'll score points with my manager if i can talk cricket with her?

geekonomist said...

That would be a great way to score with me...points that is ;-)

SPFW said...

geekonomist pull your head in!!!!!!!!! ha ha

Jj said...

stop it. just stop. you had me at hello.

SPFW said...

ha ha you said "you had me"