Six Star Wars Characters that should be on Twitter

The Sith Lord Darth Vader is on board with the Twitterverse @darthvader) threatening death chokes against all the tweeple that cross his path*. Beneath that dark exterior is a witty guy. Who else from the Star Wars universe should be on Twitter sharing the midichlorian love? What would some of their tweets be if they really were themselves?

Lando Calrissian (@landoladiesman987) This rouge gambler would be good for giving advice on avoiding sarlac pits, mining and  blowing up death stars:
@sarlecforum "sarlacs smell badder than a dead bantha, trust me"
@hansolo "Han old buddy, sabbac poker game my place tonight, bring the dumbass wookie and the keys to the Falcon."
@hansolo "Dude, I put a scratch on the Falcon, my bad."

Bobba Fett - (@BoobyF) the Bounty Hunter er fetted by millions of fans/clones
@jangofett "Get him, Dad, get him. Fire!"
@darthvader "Ha, they're pretending to be space junk"
@jabbathehutt 'have iced solo, coming to tatooine'

Obi-Wan Kenobi (@OB1K) would a wise tweeter:
@darthvader "I had the high ground!" #pwnage
@yoda "I had the high ground!" #epicsabrefight
@lukeskywalker "Use the Force, Luke!"

Yoda (@JediMasta) The original lil green man himself would brighten up the twitterverse no end with his confused Confucious like adages:
@OB1K  "Lost a planet Master Obi-Wan has. How embarrassing."
@Skywalker "Try not. Do or do not, there is no try" 
@OB1K "he is too young!" #jediupstarts
@Skywalker "There... is... another... Sky... walker"

@girlfriend "Han is so cute but he's like all mean to me!!"
@girlfriend2 "Trying new bun hairstyle for big date. Wish me luck!!"
@girlfriend3 "Kissed Luke to make Han jealous, it was like kissing a brother!!#incest"
@girlfriend4 "My new metal bikini is dead sexy but the waxing was a bitch!!"

Finally Mr Star Killer himself, Luke Skywalker (@Starkiller)

@hansolo "Leia kissed me dude, with tounge!" 
@C3PO "Shut down all the garbage smashers on the detention level, will ya? "
@yoda "Leia, Leia is my sister?! But I kissed her !oooh  #incest"
@darthvader "There is still good in you, I can feel it #oddfathersonrelationships

Which Star Wars characters do you think should be on Twitter?

*I do realise there are twitters out there with the names I've given, go find em yourself!

Bored? Check out the ultimate stars wars fan costume page!

If you watch Jaws backwards...

There's a hilarious thread on Reddit which starts with:

"If you watch the movie `Jaws' backwards, it's a movie about a shark that keeps throwing up people until they have to open a beach" 

jaws shark

Good netizens have chimed in more:

If you watch Rambo backwards, it's Sylvester Stallone healing people with his magical bullet vacuum.

If you watch the Lord of the Rings trilogy backwards, it's a saga about a little guy who gets a cool ring from a volcano and spends the rest of the films walking home.

If you watch Fight Club backwards, you see Ed Norton turn from a crazy streetperson into a successful productive member of society.

If you watch the 1997 version of Episode IV backwards, Greedo shoots first.

If you watch Alien backwards, a large monster gets tiny and climbs inside a guy's chest, calming down a panicing crew.

And my favourite:

If you watch The Exorcist backwards it's about a girl who's very sick until she eats some pea soup and finally gets better.

Chat to me on Twitter!

Hurley: I can haz cheezeburger?

Jimmy Jangles: Would you like fries with that?

hurley I can haz cheezeburger?
So like I borrowed Lost Season 5 from a kind person and I as watched Hurley confront demons and Henry Gale I thought to myself. "I can haz cheezeburger?".

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Guillermo del Toro spied in Wellington

Pretty sure I walked passed Hellboy director, Guillermo del Toro on Kent Terrace today. He was in a car yard looking No surprise del Toro is in Wellington really as he's directing the Peter Jackson produced film version of JRR Tolkien's The Hobbit. He's a fat bugger in real life! And tall. Looked like a happy chap.

So remember how Wellington used to love hearing that Liv Tyler was running round... all that's about to start again when the Hobbit starts filming. It will be all like Ron Pearlman was spotted at the Good Luck Bar sipping ice water with a twist of lime etc etc.

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Everyone's a Twitter Expert, even Jimmy Jangles

I think I might be addicted to Twitter. If I hear a bird, I think twitter. If I'm I'm on the bus, I twitter. If I twit, therefore I am. If I think of Roald Dahl's The Twits, I twitter.

Just for the record, I'm not watching America Idol waiting for my burnt copy of Slum Dog Millionaire to turn up. If I was, I'd be twittering. Check out my Jimmy Jangles' Twitter Profile

I've learnt a few things from being on Twitter and reading the sites that have jumped on board. There are Twitter Experts Every bloody Where. They tell you how to cultivate your followers and how not to loose them. They tell you that unfollowing people is like uncool man. Unfollowing means you are not engaging with the herd properly, as if there are rules about internet!

They never appear to consider that I'm unfollowing that new person I thought was interesting because I figured out they were as boring as watching paint dry. Take for instance Robert Scoble. He's got 50,000 twitter followers. He must be interesting right? Turns out he actually twits about paint drying e.g. "my favorite thing in Windows 7 is how the task bar displays multiple windows when you pass your mouse over. Very nice! " Sorry, Scoble, you got scrubbed.

What's the lesson? Pay attention twitter experts, this is why people sometimes unfollow - we are not gaming the system, we are not poor communicators - we just followed boring people! You are the weakest twit. Good bye.

Being the kind of person that likes to get tips and hints, I've read a few sites that say something like, "Don't just twit your blog posts like a robot". And that's it, with no context other than it's not good netiquette. Which is good advice if you are an average Joe Plumber, just making your way in the universe - However if you are a service provider like CNN - you don't need to engage with your audience - you provide and inform. Twitter users just want the news man and just the facts m'am. Maybe this should be reflected in the advice out there. And so CNN has 80,000 followers... without replying to me asking if the the undercoat is dry yet. Lesson fort twitter experts? Sometimes it's better to give than receive on twitter.

Okay Slumdog did actually turn up, so I'll quit while I still have popcorn left.

Disagree? Leave a rational thought or go off your nut at me on Twitter!

we love it

So like the Black Caps beat Aussie two in a row and NZ goes within one game in the Chapple Haddle Series. Taylor continued his form and Elliot showed a strond sense of calm. He might be NZ's new Chris Zinzan Harris.

Threw out the Haddin cheating saga Ricky Dicky Ponting has continued to show a lack of ability for rational speaking, continuing to run his mouth before sizing up the facts of the matter.

Bring on game 3 !

Share and share a like I say

Today I found two sites I felt I needed to share. I hardly ever share like this so run, don't walk to them*.


Zombo Com It is the most useless site in the entire history of the internet. It is also the most useful.


Cranial Soup A well written blog on html tricks, using the web like a pro with an understated sense of humour. * Stole this from this.


Do you, dear read have any blogs to share? Leave a note in the comments. No with no follow removed. Bless me, for I am a giver.