Stacked Actress

I wrote this on the bus ride home last night, you tell me what its about.

Stacked Actress

She’s an actress
Dealin’ in theatrics
I cant’ stand these circus tricks
And Dear God, I need a fix

She’s an actress
Stacked to the hilt
Causing me stress
I’d rather date Aker Bilk

Flashed in the pan
A tragic thespian play
I can’t stand,
That for these tickets I had to pay

Keep It Together

So what's the deal with David Hasselhoff? He's become some kind of crazy icon. Every so often a deranged emailer sends me a picture of 'The Hoff' in some disturbing pose. Surfing. Posing at the Beach. Shirtless. Now he was cool as fuck in Night Rider. He had the beach babes in Baywatch. Not that we actually watched the bay much. Then he fell from grace and did an american bastard version of Dr Who.... NE way whats the deal with all of the attention? Shouldn't it be about the car? Chicks dig the car. Without Kit the talking car the Hoff is nothing? a mere has been like William Shatner?

A terrible joke to round off.

David Hasselhoff walks into a bar and says to the barman, "I want you to call me David Hoff".

The barman replies "Sure thing Dave... no hassle."

5

5 wickets for Martin!!!! Thats one thing Tamihere can't deny! ;)

Here we go again?????

Update: New Zealand 119/5 (Vincent 15* McCullum 3*)


New Zealand 2nd innings R M B 4 6

CD Cumming lbw b Malinga 16 73 0 0
JAH Marshall lbw b Jayasuriya 39 122 6 0
HJH Marshall lbw b Malinga 6 17 0 0
PJ Wiseman lbw b Malinga 0 5 0 0
*SP Fleming retired hurt 6 9 1 0
NJ Astle not out 19 51 1 0
L Vincent not out 14 29 1 0

Extras (lb 6, w 1, nb 8) 15

Total (4 wickets, 49.4 overs) 115

Keep your teeth clean, DYKWIM?

More on Tamihere.

Apparently he gave this quote on le televizzion last night. I think it is absolute genius.

"I idolise Michael Cullen - I'd give the bloke my toothbrush if he asked for it"

I only grudgingly share my toothbrush with girl friends.....

-

Today I accidentally put on odd shoes. Both black so no one noticed....

100 100 99

So the Black Caps have finally fired in the test arena. After a slaughtering at the merciless blade of Gilly and co, NZ have put on nearly 500 runs against Sri Lankia in the Napier test.

Marshall (H) smashed a top class 160 and Astle (N) scored his tenth test century with a 116. Onya boys! McCullum (B)is on 80 and looks good to make a 100 as well. When was the last time NZ had 3 centurions in an innings? I’m not sure but I think it could have been Lou Vincent’s century on debut innings against Aussie a few years back.

So if this is a case of all things being equal (NZ batting line up) and you change one thing McGrath to Vass – it just shows u how dam good the Aussie bowlers are.

Bring on the Ashes tour of England….


Update: McCullum LBW in the nervous nineties for 99. D'oh! Thats two outs in the 90's for him. He must be hacked off. Franklin has got his first test 50 so well done.

Only in Thailand?

So I'm doing some research for a speech and I came across this foto. It appears its one of those 'classic' viral emails that get sent around....

The perils of punting

By a mate Nige who blindly backs the Warratah's each season to win the Super 12 ....

THE PERILS OF PUNTING by Nige

One day while surfing the net
I thought I'd have a wee bet
An attempt to recover
my funds lost on other
Previous failed attempts

I picked out the Oz Waratahs
A side brimming with stars
They'd started ok
with wins home and away
By round five, their record unmarred

But then they met Canterbury's pack
With blokes like Maxwell and Jack
While low down and cheatin'
they had no problems beatin'
The Tah's, whose defence turned to crap

So gone again are my bucks
Wasted on those Waratahs schmucks
Once again I've been burned
you'd think I'd learn
That Australian rugby is not very good at the moment.