It gets worse...


The Manatee just reported his ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands.
 
Police reckon that he topped himself.

Before and After


Before

After


I listen to Johnny Cash to try and ease the pain
But I drink a beer and just get drunk again
I thought I had it all
But now Welcome to the Suck.

You'll never be a Kiwi till you love our watties sauce!


So like I was filling in my census form last night and I came to that curly one about ethnicity that's been having a stir in the MSM -  does this blue eyed blonde write down he is a proud New Zealander or tick the New Zealand European box like a good little conformist?

 

It's a question on ethnicity, rather than nationality I suppose… so I was heading NZ European way - but to be sure I looked up the definition of 'ethnic' in the dictionary mum gave me when I was 12 -  it had the usual ra ra about race, minority but it also gave the suggestion that ethnic was grouping by shared beliefs, languages etc. There was nothing about Buttered Chicken.

 

I thought yep, New Zealanders could fit that description. Our common belief is the All Blacks will win the Rugby World Cup and that we should have Brought Back Buck. Hence I'm an ethnic New Zealander.

 

So I wrote down New Zealander. And then I thought, that will just help screw the stats in terms of their intended use. So I ticked New Zealand European box too.

 

If they had of asked me to fill in a box saying I was a pakeha I would have baulked cos that's just so…. rangi.