The Fat Dancer from Take That

“The Fat Dancer from Take That” was the name given to Robbie Williams by Noel Gallagher in 2000 when they were in the middle of a public slanging match. Noel is famous in some parts for his quips and quotes. Some are designed to generate publicity and some are just mean.

Wishing Damon Albarn from Blur would die of AIDS was perhaps his most vile comment of them all.

    Said dancer in question

Robbie responded to the fat dancer comment by calling Noel a "mean spirited dwarf". The comments continued and escalated when Noel offered Williams a gun so that he could kill himself.

This was all following how Williams was befriended by both Noel and Liam Gallagher, at the time when their band was the world’s most popular. Paranoid and taking too much cocaine, according to Mr Williams, they fell out in proper rock star fashion – through the press.

The reference to Robbie being a fat dancer is now a tad ironic as though Robbie had become a successful singer in his own right at the time the comment was made, he went on to become a major solo artist, being just as popular as Oasis in their hey day.

In 2009 the last laugh could be on Robbie as Oasis split up leaving Noel open to quips that he’s just that old cranky bastard from Oasis. Still, the rumours abound that Robbie is going to rejoin with the reformed Take That so we'll see what comment Noel makes if that happens...

Did you hear Noel Gallagher has a new album out? Do the Damage is a b-side to the lead single, In the Heat of the Moment.

All your dreams are made of strawberry lemonade

Oasis’ new best of ‘Stop the Clocks’ has me flying a plane in my big mouth. Not that I need it, I have every Oasis album and a billion singles but it’s the concept of Oasis having a best of out that I love.

Some might say Oasis are over the hill, hasbeens who should make way for gonna bees.

Well stop the clock indeed, Don’t Believe the Truth put paid to the disaster that was the great rock and roll swindle, Be Here Now and picked up where Heathen Chemistry had hinted the band had rebirthed and firmly stomped Oasis back to number one all around the world.

Oasis are the best band in the world and that’s a fact, Jacky Brown.

No band since 1994 has consistently released such quality output, especially in terms of singles being released. The song writing is suburb, though granted their delivery has not always been the case. A blend of all Who have been before infused with a lil bit of stolen Teen Spirit has meant Oasis were the bomb. They needed each other as much as fans like me needed them.

Stop the Clocks will stack up as one of the best best ofs ever. In my blatantly subjective and biased opinion it rates up there with Michael Jackson’s History, Beatles “1” and the Eagles. Songs like Wonderwall, Live Forever, Lyla, Slide Away, Songbird, The Importance of Being Idle and The Masterplan make it so.

In a captain Piccard kind of way.

The fact Stops the Clocks will not have Roll With It, Stand by Me, D’yer know what I mean or Whatever on it speaks volumes as to the quality of the songs that are there.

The thing about Oasis has always been their b-sides. They are better than most band’s A sides. And thus The Masterplan is treated like the National Anthem in Britain and deserves its place on the album.

So all your Oasis haters out there can go listen to your Gnarls Barley and your EMO crap, people who know what music is supposed to sound like and make you feel, head down to your Soundz or whereever next week and grab yourself a copy. That’s what a space man would do. D’yer know what I mean?


Extra for Experts:

I will concede that if Metallica were to put a best of up I imagine that would pretty much be the best best of ever.